Looking Back, Looking Forward

It's about time that I finally sit down here and pull my thoughts together over all that has gone on in the last month or two. I've been keeping pretty busy, but still probably goofing off a little to much in some respects. I sleep hard when I get to that point, but generally not long enough (rarely 8 hours), so I have definitely been tired. I think this needs to come up next time I have a physical, which is due about now. The problem with feeling tired, is that I tend to get less done, feel less alert, think less clearly, get into more trouble, lose and forget things. A case in point, I am missing a 50 mm. lens, one set of keys, and a remote trigger currently. At least I know where the remote trigger is if I can remember to inquire about it when I'm at church. I hope it's still there, anyway.

In August, I was called back to work after a very short furlough, and the callback was rather brief as well. On August 13, I had tickets to the Waking Ashland Reunion tour at Kilby Court and I was working. Fortunately I had know way ahead of time and it was already on my leave calendar. So, on August 13, I was able to rest a little, take the day off and head down to Salt Lake City to see Jonathan and company at Kilby. On the way I stopped at the Gateway to see if Miss Corey still needed a ride, so we visited shortly, and I headed to the venue.Kilby is a very small venue that is something akin to a very large garage. It possibly holds about 200 people or so. It's really cozy. The stage entrance is outside near the entrance, so it's pretty much near impossible not to meet with artists that play there. There is a "courtyard" of sorts with a fire pit (although it wasn't being used on the 13th, since it was summer) and a shed where merch is usually sold. For some reason the merch tables were set up outside in the "courtyard." There were a few waking ashland tees that were pulled from storage in someone's garage, and cd's. I purchase a cd and a couple of tees that were reasonably priced. Several of the openers were there when I arrived, but I didn't see Jonathan anywhere or Jason of Feet, Feet, Feet Parachute, and I had something for them. Eventually I caught up with them and Naked Juice and Bananas (Really, Naked Juice is a drink, look in the stores. LOL)

Larusso opened with an acoustic set, and I always enjoy Aaron's performances.


After Aaron finished his set, The Trademark took over the stage, and the whole venue for that matter. Riley is a bit crazy on stage. The music is a bit on the screamy side for me sometimes, but one cannot say their show is boring. It did seem an odd fit with the other bands, though. At the start of their set, the Trademake guys all were wearing fake mustaches, but Riley just couldn't get the thing to stay on for more that a minute or two. I think that has become sort of a "trademark" for the band, and perhaps I'll ask how that all started sometime. LOL



The next band to perform was Apple Horse from Idaho. I was really impressed with their set and liked their music quite a lot. The only caveat was a song they did having something to do with a unicorn. We were told that there was going to be a piano song, but it was being changed, and it turned out to be my least favorite in the set. It wasn't bad, it just didn't grab me like the others. I do think I'll be purchasing some of their music in the near future. After Apple Horse finished playing, I asked for the set list and was able to get a copy.




Feet, Feet, Feet Parachute was setting up to play next. Jason De la Torre is the lead singer for 3Feet Parachute (like the nickname?) and he also plays with Jonathan's band, We Shot the Moon, so I've seen him a few times before. Last time We Shot the Moon played, he performe one of his songs and I enjoyed it. I have the cd, and I have to say his vocals don't sound quite the same as in the live performance. I was a little concerned that I wouldn't like it, but to the contrary I enjoyed the set a lot.

Then it was finally time for Waking Ashland to play. I had never actually seen Waking Ashland before, though I've seen Jonathan solo, and We Shot the Moon a number of times. Somehow when the original band was together, the timing never really worked out. They played the entire Composure album from start to finish and I loved every minute of it. I took a lot of pics, although with lighting being what it is at Kilby getting anything sharp was difficult at best, so there weren't many I consider publishable. I very rarely record shows for a few reasons, one being that most artists don't allow it, although some that say it obviously don't seem to care and even mug for the camera. I was pretty sure Jonathan didn't mind, so I had the brilliant idea of recording one of the songs. Jonathan has a great voice and great keyboarding skills, and is just such a joy to listen to. (I do wish the vocals had recorded a bit louder.)






After the show ended, I hung about a bit, talked to Corey, Jonathan, and several other people. I had my photo taken with Trevor (drummer for WSTM and FFFP) and Jason
and they showed off their "guns". (Not sure I'll ever get used to that term. It makes me laugh.)

I waited about a bit until I could get a photo with Jonathan before heading for home.


If I recall correctly, that was the night they had freeway (and/or) lane closures and it took a little extra time to get home. Still I made it home sooner than I would have had I gone to work, albeit not by much.

Monday it was back to work, as usual but I had another show to look forward to the following Saturday, August 21. Candlelight Serenade with some of my favorite bands and people all for a good cause. I was excited about it. I didn't need to request the day off, since it was a Saturday, but I did really hope to be furloughed by Friday because sleeping is a little nice sometimes and the doors opened at 10 a.m.

I almost got my wish...

(end part one)

Cupcakes and Other Things

Cupcakes & Other Things
Category: Life


Well, I decided it would be a good idea to make a white cake. Now I've made it from scratch before, but I wasn't planning anything that elaborate. I just had been craving some cake for some unknown reason and it sounded like it would be good. Besides, I've had two white cake mixes in the cupboards for what seems an eternity. It was time they were used.

So, I mixed up the cake mix (eating what was probably several cupcakes worth of batter in the process) and put a dozen cupcakes in the oven to bake. I even managed to put a load of dishes in the dishwasher. The recipe on the box cited 350 deg. as the recommended oven temp, but it seemed a tad hot, and sometimes my oven cooks a little on the hot side, so I decided to turn it down to 325. Then I headed downstairs with book in hand and proceeded to read the rest of The Five People You Meet in Heaven. (It's a bood book, btw.)

Usually from where I sit in the computer room, at my desk, I can start to smell things baking about the time they are ready to come from the oven. I didn't smell the cupcakes. I forgot about them. A good 45 minutes later my mind starts screaming, ""Cupcakes!" But then I was rather puzzled as I expected to smell something - something burning, but I didn't. I had no idea what I would find when I got to the top of the stairs. The cupcakes gratefully are not burnt. Oh, they are even maybe a little edible, but they more have more of the consistency of a cookie than a cupcake. So I have 12 rather "dry" and slightly crunchy cupcakes, but hey, they are not burnt. They aren't even too bad served with very vanilla soymilk.

Pardon me while I take the last three cupcakes out of the oven. Hey, three good cupcakes isn't bad. LOL After all, there are only two of us here.

Note to self: If the front door is open on a warm spring day, don't rely on smell to alert you to the fact that the cupcakes are done cooking. LOL

Peace out,

Melanie

Lots to say, but nowhere to start...

There has been so very much going on lately, that I have no idea where to start. LOL

I'm back at work. This is a good thing, overall. I have to get out and live in the real world for a while, and the pay definitely doesn't hurt. Things have been a bit tight, but I'm still supporting my concert habit. Just when I think I'll cut back several of my favorites will come to town. I love it too much, I guess.

I'm very excited to see Mute Math this Thursday! I'm also excited to see Angels & Airwaves, The Color Fred and Meg and Dia on Tuesday, but I don't know them quite as well and we haven't met yet. LOL I've been listening to TCF's cd this week a little and I think I'll like Fred's set. The downside is no photo pass. I'll request one this weekend, if I can figure out who to ask. LOL But this Thursday, I get to see one of my very favorite bands open for Matchbox 20. Roy says they will be at the merch tables after Alanis' set, so I'm double excited to actually get to see them!!! I not only love their music, but I'm quite fond of them as well. I don't know if they'll understand why, but I did blog about that very issue once. And, I found out some really good/happy news for a certain someone in the band, so I'm way more excited than I probably should be. Again, the downside is the camera thing. I hope they at least allow point and shoots. I can usually photograph Mute Math, and I would so be excited to get to in some decent lighting for once, but it would have to go through Matchbox 20 this time. Anyone know how to contact them? I just want to take pics of Mute Math (not that I wouldn't love the opportunity to photograph the others, just MM is more important to me.)

This week I had to put in 46 hours so that I could go to the shows. I was sweating it for a bit as work is denying all leave until March 14. I finally got approval last night, so it's a huge relief!! I had to turn copies of my tickets and my receipts.

In addition to the 46 hours last Saturday I was up at 6 a.m. (after working until 1 a.m., getting home around 1:30 and staying up until 4 a.m. to prepare) to work at the Steven Curtis Chapman concert. It was a very long day, but one with some good memories. I really wish I could have met Steven, but I had the opportunity to meet his sons and I thought they were very nice indeed. There wasn't a lot of time to chat, but it was really a pleasure meeting them just the same. I worked in catering, so I helped set up and prepare food. I made a trash run once.

One thing I can say about this tour is that it cemented my impression of tour bus drivers. They continue to be some of the nicest people. I guess bands wouldn't want them around otherwise, I suppose. I talked to one of the bus drivers a bit during breakfast. We are both lactose intolerant and he was looking for something he could drink. We talked about Lactaid and Soy Milk, and he had a runner take him to the store a little later and came back with some Lactaid and said it was for me. LOL I thought that was really sweet! So, you know I had to have some with my lunch.

For the concert I purchased a reserved seat in the front row. Someone made an error and treated the seating in the VIP section as open for the first few rows. So, I had a little argument with the person in my seat to no avail. I spotted a seat between 2 couples dead center front row and finally gave up and sat there. I felt badly for the person that should have had that seat, though. Anyway, it was only the second time at that sort of venue for me, and overall things went well. Word has it that Steven and company were quite happy and want to come back, so that makes my day! He said they were treated like gold. That's how it should be.

After the show, I hung about outside the meet/greet for a few minutes, but only a few. I was sort of hoping to be able to go in but there was work to be done, so I was feeling I should help. It was good, though, because I got to talk to a few friends there, met Will Chapman and others. During the concert there was a collection to help offset expenses for an adopting family. I met them before the show and afterward they were in the catering area and I got them all drinks. I really enjoyed meeting them a lot and hope I can see them again sometime. They are a beautiful family. I managed to get some pics of them on the stage at the end of the show as well.

It was a very long day. I don't think I can remember being so very tired but it was worth it. So many good things happened. As usual, I have to struggle with my more selfish side of things sometimes which I always hate, but it's probably a good thing to work through this somehow.

As for the rest of my life, I have my days and nights totally swapped. I was up until after 7 a.m. and woke up around 3. It's 6:43 p.m. and I'm still at the computer in my nightgown. Don't get too excited, it's cutesy but that's all. ;? My feet are cold, but inertia has set in, so I've done nothing about it. The plan was to go to Olive Garden tonight with our gift card, but Ed has settled in for the day, so it's unlikely. As I thought about it, Sunday evening would be better as there are fewer crowds and Ed hates crowds. I love the OG, though. :) If I could eat there twice a day I'd be happy except I'd probably look more like a blimp than I already do.

Things are busy, but I just want to sit here a while. A nice warm shower sounds good. I think that's my next stop.

God's blessings,
Melanie

Misfits

This is rather how I'm feeling lately.



Do you ever feel like you really don't belong anywhere? Sigh...

Hmmmm.... feelings I hate:

I hate feeling like I'm being tolerated rather than liked. How do you know?
I hate feeling that I'm a pest, even if I am.
I hate that I can't just trust that maybe someone might actually like me.
Again, how do you know?
I hate that I don't know what to do most of the time lately. I thought I had all this settled so long ago... I hate feeling unsettled and uncertain so often.
I hate that I know lots of people, but hardly anyone comes to my house. Yea, it's messy. I know that isn't the reason, since someone would have to be here to know that. LOL. I mean how many people do I really invite? I'm not really upset with anyone over it. I just feel isolated sometimes.
I hate it when I feel like I overstayed my welcome. I need clear good-byes and I never feel like I have the timing quite right.
I hate that I feel like crying for no reason whatsoever - usually a good sign that my hormones have gone completely whacko. Hopefully, this too, shall pass.
I really hate feeling patronized.
I hate feeling stupid - a feeling I have a real struggle with lately.

I love feeling accepted, and sometimes a little guilty that it's important.

O.K. so that's out of the way... for Christians, do you ever wonder if anyone really is making it at all out there - or even coming close? I'd love to know since it would give me hope. I know people will always let me down. God doesn't, but I want to see people really making it - whatever that means.

American Dream has been on my mind a lot...
This ain't my American Dream
I want to live and die for bigger things

I just don't know what or how. God, please show me.

--Melanie

P.S. I know this is risky to post, but maybe someone else can relate

Today I cried for someone I don't even know...

I am sitting here feeling rather melancholy already. A migraine has started, I think. I spent the last two hours asking myself if this is really a migraine and should I take something for it or wait and see. I hate taking meds. So the debate goes on.

I'm trying to figure out the details of my trip to California, and it's all a jumble in my mind. I have so much to do that inertia has all but set in. I have items that are too large for the suitcase. The dishes should be done (well, maybe a torch to the house would solve the problem - and yes that was intended sarcasm) and a scrapbook to finish up, though it's nearly complete. Everywhere some little detail stops me and I freeze until the minutes tick on by and become hours. I'm excited and nervous, but I can't feel motivated. Inside I want to panic and move, but outwardly, I'm stuck.

I am also very tired. I actually left work early on a Friday night using sick leave. I tried very hard to stay, but I was falling asleep. My rates were falling and I would wonder what I just typed on the page - checking and rechecking and hoping I wasn't doing anything really outlandish. (In case you are wondering, I am a data transcriber.) My stomach hasn't been right for about a week and a half now, but I'm rather afraid to go in again. I just had a gastroscopy a few months back, and I don't really want another. So I wonder what can they really do? I'm sure exhaustion plays a part in my current mood and perhaps even with the other problems as well.

So, in my current state of inertia, I decided to check on a few blogs I frequent. First I read Zach's blog again. I keep reading his last blog trying to sort through it and still remaining speechless afterwards. His blog seems somehow "lost" and today that's pretty much how I feel. I'm sorting through things in a way that I thought one should have mastered by the time they left adolescence. Things that used to seem clear somehow don't anymore. I haven't really lost my faith or beliefs. Those are intact. What I have difficulty sorting through is where those fit in and why I have such a hard time being anything but the fallen human being that I am. And who else, besides God, can I trust anyway? I used to be so trustworthy and dependable, and I feel so much less capable of both trustworthiness and dependability. I used to be relatively out of debt, and now I'm not. So, my plan seems to be to just give up and go with it. Sometimes it seems the harder I try the worse it gets.

None of that matters really, in the long run, except I want to be responsible, I want to be charitable, I want to be liked (sometimes too much) ... I think there are too many "I's" in that sentence. LOL

So, then I went to see if Jon had posted any new blogs without any real expectations.
Instead he had posted two. The first one I read just hit me. Casey of Hawthorne Heights had passed away. I hadn't heard. It was really eerie. I didn't really know him. We hadn't met, but I had seem him play in concert on two occasions. The first was in Las Vegas at the Nintendo Fusion Tour. The second was at the Boise Warped Tour. I didn't know him, but I cried. Sometimes I think it's easier to cry when I don't know someone too well. When I know them too well, I go into survivor mode. I know a LOT about grief and grieving, but I can't seem to apply it to myself. But Casey's death made me cry. I feel sad that we never met, and never will. I feel sad that his family must really be reeling along with all of the guys in Hawthorne Heights. I can't even imagine what they must be feeling and I'm not sure it would be healthy to even try, but my heart goes out the them all.

So, I sit in the middle of this mess that is me at the moment, and cry for someone I didn't really know and hope he is at peace. But in the midst of my current mish mash of emotion, I still really do know that there is God that loves me, although as usual I can't figure out why; and I grieve for those who try to sort through it all without that hope.

Life is not always easy. I don't think anyone, not even God, ever promised that it would be. I am my own worst enemy. I make too many bad choices. But I have hope. Sometimes I just need to be reminded.

I think now would be a good time to make a list of all the things I am thankful for. God really has blessed me. If I am miserable now, it is mostly of my own making.

My hope for all who read is that you will find peace with God, peace with yourself, and be thankful for what you have. It's so easy to be distracted and miss these things altogether.

--Melanie

So much going on... my so called life, part 1

There has been so much happening lately that I don't even know where to begin. I'm not even sure where the beginning is. LOL This will, in all likelihood be a novella.
Creation West was amazing, but by the time the last day came around I was rather glad it didn't go on for one more day. My body was telling me it was enough of a good thing. :)
I am not a good long distance driver. My max is generally about 5 hours. It's more than twice that to The Gorge. Somehow I made it with very little sleep. On Tuesday (the 24th) I was up about 8 a.m. to help load up all of my daughter's salon furnishings (stations, sinks, hair dryers, cabinets, etc.) into a moving truck to be placed into storage. My plan was to leave for Creation at about 3 p.m., but we didn't finish with the salon business until about 2:30 and afterwards we went to have a late lunch (or was that early dinner?) By the time I got home, showered and the car loaded for the trip, it was after 6 p.m. I pulled out of the driveway at 6:22 p.m.
I did rather well the first part of the trip, but I was very tired. I had thought about stopping and sleeping a few hours at about Ontario, OR at the Motel 6 there, but since I left so late I decided not to. Instead I slept at a rest stop for about 2 hours. I stopped one other time to sleep along the way for about an hour. The other driver's on the road were rather appreciative that I finally was off the road, I have a feeling. I wanted to make Creation by 8 a.m. when the gates opened, but I ended up arriving closer to 9:45 a.m. - which was about 1/2 hr. ahead of my time last year. The funny thing is that I ended up almost in the same spot as last year. The Honeybuckets weren't too far away - fortunately far enough away, though. LOL The showers were not exactly close, but not too far. Everything else was a pretty good hike from my campsite. Setting up the tent was easy since I have a self-erecting tent. It was so hot at the campsite I decided I might as well wait at the gate, so I took my sunscreen, my snacks, a few drinks, the items I took for RK and my blanket and headed for the gate. It was a long wait as the gate didn't open for another four hours, but I was the first person in line. LOL In the end, I'm not sure how much that accounted for. Slowly people started joining me in line. Second in line was a Hawk Nelson fan I met last year and her friend. Eventually a group of young people had joined me, and they decided to play a game called "Big Booty." It was pretty funny. They tried to get me to play, but I was a party pooper. The game did take some concentration and on 3 hours of sleep, it just wasn't going to happen for me. LOL The game went on nearly the entire 4 hours, with new people joining and leaving the whole time. I do think there were a few hardy souls who lasted the entire game. Time seemed to just crawl by. The sun beat down, but all of us stood rather firm.
At last it was time for the gates to open. Everyone started heading through security. Some of the people that came after me promised to try and keep me at the front, but it all fell through. I think they tried, though, we just were separated. In the end, I was not exactly at the front. A few tall guys locked arms in front of me and wouldn't budge. Somehow during the trip down the hill, they hit a roadblock and fell back and I ended up in front after all. So I did get my spot in front of the stage, right where Jon S. would be during Relient K's set. That is exactly where I wanted to be. I knew I would be leaving, though, so the tricky part was hanging onto the spot. I started discussing my dilemma with about 4 or 5 people around me and told them I really needed to go and meet someone and not lose my spot. I finally told them who I was meeting, so they said they'd hold it for me, and I literally ran up the hill towards the merch tents. Did I say that I was too old and out of shape for this? LOL I made it to the top and hit an area that was blocked off. I asked how to get to the tents from there and the security guy instructed me to walk all the way around. I simply said, "I can't" and he took pity on me and let me take a short cut for which I was extremely grateful. I finally arrived at the tents, and found that they weren't supposed to open for another 15 minutes. SO, I was waiting, and thinking I wasn't going to make it back in time to keep my place. Then I saw Jon and shouted out to him. He came to the gate and the security guard said I couldn't go in, so Jon flashed his badge and said he was with the band and that worked. We had a nice visit, and I took pics. I tried to video for Brittany, but I couldn't remember how to work the recorder on my camera, so Jon wrote a note for her and I took a pic of him to go with it. He's cool that way. :) I was such a ditz the entire time. I mean, I'm a ditz anyway, but on such little sleep and all the oxygen deprivation from running up the hill, I was extra loopy. (Thanks Jon for being so patient.) Anyway, I finally said my good-byes, and headed back for the stage. When I got back I needed something to drink badly, so I stopped by the medical table, and tried to get something, but the guy said, "just a minute" and pretty much ignored me. There was one gal there with a couple of skinned knees and a few others sitting. It was so hot standing there that I just went back to my spot by the stage, which I was very grateful to still have. At one point I asked security if it was possible to get a little bit of water and he said I'd have to go to the medical table. (Been there, done that, didn't work.) So, I decided to take a chance and tough it out. I'm stubborn that way. He said if I had to be hauled out, I wouldn't like it. A few times I almost thought I'd have to be. But, I survived. Hawk Nelson put on an awesome show as they did last year. I think I had to sit down during part of their set because I was nauseous, though. Superchick was amazing and very energetic. I was especially looking forward to seeing Jars of Clay and Relient K, and I wasn't disappointed in either. Jars of Clay was fun, and I still get a kick out of their shorts and crew socks. I wasn't surprised, though since I'd seen pics from other festivals this summer. I did hear quite a few comments, though. I think others got a kick out of their attire as well. I think CW was Relient K's best show that I've seen to date. Matty was really animated on stage and really seemed to be having fun. I tried, in vain, to get some decent photos. Matty gave me a shout out (kind of a quiet shout out), but it sounded like he said, "Mellie" so I wasn't sure if he was talking about me or not. LOL I was just pretty excited that they were doing Sloop John B, because I love their rendition. Jon was fun to watch on stage, as always. And, as always, the set just seemed to go by too quickly.
I stayed after and picked up trash, as I usually do. I am just amazed that people leave so much garbage behind! If everyone decided to take two items more than they left behind and tossed them, I don't think there'd be anything for the clean-up crew to do, and I think they'd be o.k. with that, actually. I had kinda hoped to see Jon again, but never did catch up with him afterwards. I'm sure he had a long day as well. On the way back to the campsite I stopped at the tent for the "midnight" show and stayed for the remainder of Nazareth's show. He was pretty funny, and I really enjoyed it. Then I headed back to my campsite, ate some tuna salad with crackers, had some very vanilla soy milk and turned in for some much needed sleep. Day 1 was long and hot, but good.
Stay tuned for more... But first, I'd better actually get something accomplished today. LOL
Peace out,
Melanie
P.S. still to come... Days 2-4 and the trip home, closing the chapter on my daughter's salon, and 2 nights of David Meece. Oh, and pics. :)
P.S.S. If you check out Wednesday's Creation West 2007 podcast at http://www.monsterpod.com/ I can be seen going through the gate. Thanks to Socks for letting me know. Kinda scray, huh?

Creation West or bust?

Where has July gone?
I really can't believe that July is nearly over already. There are good things happening at the end of July, and many things that need to be done. For one thing, I'm heading off to Creation West on July 24 in hopes of being to the Gorge bright and early on July 25. I'm not ready. It doesn't really help matters too much when you think you have 2 weeks left to prepare and suddenly realize it's only 6 days, then 5, now 4..... and the time just keeps slipping away. But my prayer is always that things will work out in God's perfect timing, and that is one prayer that has always been answered, no matter how much I worry or stress. God is faithful. I wish I were that dependable. :)
I have much to do, that's why I'm on here trying to pscyh myself up to start. Procrastinating is so much easier, and I need to wake up a bit or that's what I tell myself. I suppose the shower I need to take would do the same thing? LOL
Today I need to empty my trunk of all the magazines I put there yesterday from my daughter's salon, and a few things from my home in the recycle bin in the local store parking lot, finish packing, check out storage for my daughter's salon stations, find a rental truck, make a trek to Salt Lake City & Toole, and maybe clean around here a bit.
As you may have gathered, we are closing my daughter's salon. In some ways, it's rather hard on me as I so wanted it to succeed, but it is undercapitalized and while she did really rather well building clientele who are quite loyal, the business could not succeed with out booth rentals, and none of us knew how to go about advertising booth availability nor did we have the resources. People left, no one took their place. The last day is the end of July. It's a long way from being moved, and my daughter set the date for Tuesday... the day I'm leaving.
It's the end of July, and I'm not quite ready.
But I'm excited for new adventures just the same.
Pray for me -- I need it. :) I can think of a million other people who need the prayer more than I do, but if you happen to give me a thought during your busy day and say a prayer, I'd be grateful just the same.
God's blessings,Melanie

Family, Life and Love

It's been a long week and at times very bitter sweet. I have had the opportunity to see my family and all of my siblings together at the same time, which is a rare occurence. There are 6 of us altogether, and I am the oldest of the whole crazy bunch. I saw my son, who I don't get to see to terribly often, either. My mom and dad (who have been divorced since I was 19) were there as well. So, I was so grateful to get to see everyone.
I'm not really sure how much to share on a myspace blog. Suffice it to say that my step dad is not doing well, and is home with hospice care. He and my mom renewed their vows because it was something he wanted. It was supposed to happen at the end of August, but there were concerns that it would be too late, so it was moved to July 1. My mom flew everyone who lived further away out to be there, and that included me. I left Saturday morning after working until 1 a.m. and then came back Monday with plans to work at 4:30 p.m. as usual. I was pretty tired to say the least.
I tried to work, but it wasn't going well. I kept falling asleep while trying to type, then I'd have to recheck the document because I couldn't even recall what I had typed. It wasn't good. Then I was having intestinal problems as well. I came home about halfway through the night, and tried to sleep. At about 12:30 a.m., I woke up sick. So now I'm trying to figure out if I've recovered enough to go back to work, but I know it isn't going to look good if I stay home just before the holiday. :( I'll probably go in.
Anyway, it was an interesting weekend. All but a few of my nieces and nephews are pretty much grown up now and some have thier own families. I was able to see some of the kids I haven't seen in a while, or have never seen. It's something I really hate missing. Kids grow up so very fast.
My family is a bit of a microcosm of the whole of mankind, I think. We have every sort of person, trial, and joy all balled into one. I think it's because there are so many of us. We are having to watch someone die, my niece wasn't able to be there because she had a baby girl, two babies are growing and waiting to make their appearance - life and death, liberals, conservatives, people celebrating 30 plus years together, some divorced, single moms, single with no children, and married with kids. And we all love each other. As my step dad said in one of his more lucid moments... loving each other is what's important.
Tell someone you love them today. The day goes by too quickly.
--Melanie

Health issues

Sometimes I'm rather fond of the old adage, "I'm sick and tired of being sick and tired." This month it has been especially true. Today I went back to work after coming down with the flu on Monday (something I am told I have in common with Bo Bice now), and starting treatment for bronchitis on Wednesday. I'm not getting well too quickly. Maybe it's because I'm older now. However, this is the third time for the flu since the end of September, and twice it has developed into bronchitis. This is not normal for me. Once every other year is more my norm.

SO, today, I finally went back to work. I was fortunate to have a bit of sick leave built up, but I think it's going quickly. I figured I'd better go back today.

I managed to type about 15 documents before I started getting the funny vision. It kept getting worse, and worse and worse until I had to look around blurry, spotty places in my vision to see the numbers I was typing on the documents. I felt a little light-headed once or twice, but I managed to finish the batch, put a second batch I had back on the truck and instruct the back-up lead that I was heading for the nurse's office. She said I needed to be seen, even though it was most likely an ocular migraine, albeit a very bad one. I didn't have a headache yet. She had me call someone to pick me up. It took three tries to reach my husband by phone. He doesn't like to answer the phone, especially if he doesn't know the number (so now he knows what USG means.) I hope my life never depends on him picking up the phone. LOL

This is about the third one of the ocular migraines I've had in recent times. The last time the visual disturbance was almost as pronounced, and a little scary. After about the third day into the headache I finally cried "uncle" and went to see the doctor who gave me Maxtor. It took two doses. This time I got on meds before there was much of a headache. Funny thing is there is a bit of pressure, no headache, and it's still sort of there, which makes deciding what to do with the meds tricky. I'm taking a wait and see at the moment. Hopefully I won't regret it.

Tomorrow I have to go back to work again. My car will be there waiting. My husband will have to take me to work, which means I'll have to walk farther. I could scan him into the lot, but figure I'd better not, since I'm not sure that's technically allowed.

I have tickets to the Tooth & Nail tour on June 11, and was to take half a day off. I can't even get excited about it. A lot of it is being sick. But I guess I have a few days to recover before then. And I will feel badly taking off when I just missed so much due to illness this time around.

Like I said, "I'm sick and tired of being sick and tired."

Looking forward to hopefully getting over all this.

--Melanie